Tuesday, April 5, 2011

We pregnant women talk in terms of weeks, thankyouvermuch

Just like the freaky mind readers at Babycenter.com predicted, now that we're officially in the third trimester, I am randomly plagued by things like restless leg syndrome, shooting lower back pains and the feeling that someone has taken a chest spreader to my ribs. Okay, the last one is all me, but the rest is all Babycenter. And I hate it when those bastards are right.

As I leapt (read: hauled) myself out of bed the other night for bathroom break #37 of the day, I was greeted by a searing pain in my lower back that actually made me yelp. While hobbling around the room rubbing my back, I said to Chip, "Well, the next few weeks are certainly going to be fun around here." His response, while sympathetic, was not what I had hoped. "The next few weeks? Unless you're planning to have this baby early, I think we're talking more like the next few months."

After assuring Chip that no, I hadn't paid Dr. Simckes to expedite the delivery, I also assured him that if he's smart, he will join me in using weeks as the official baby countdown-o-meter.

Unless, of course, I am freaking out about something that has to be done pre-baby. In that case, he would be wise to speak in terms of months, as in "But babe, we have two-and-a-half months to go! Plenty of time for me to mulch all the beds, hang a new front porch light, clean the basement, install a new doorbell cover, pull out and wash all of the baby gear, visit Great-Grandma Lindh in Chicago, finish Mary Clare's new room and have new carpeting installed." Just speaking hypothetically, of course.


  1. And then once the baby is born people will be talking about its age in terms of months even after it turns one or maybe even two. I have always found that odd, almost disconcerting.

  2. I have to admit until now, the week reference was always a challenge for me, you are painting a scary picture of my future, Hang in there!


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